英语搞笑面试剧本_英文搞笑面试剧本
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剧本
面试官：L
应聘者一：Z
应聘者二：T 出场 室内
L:（上来擦桌子，摆放文件，然后回头）Today is the first day of Foxconn Group´s job interview.I´m responsible for the recruitment。I´m Li.We recruit all kinds of elite from nationwide.Swift horse is very often but bole is hard to find。I´m just the bole.It is well known,Our company´s benefits occupy a certain height in the world, Foxconn second, who would dare to say the first? Welcome to the job fair today.Let's start the interview with some questions.Now please make a simple introduce about yourself.Z:Good morning.It is really my honor to have the opportunity for an interview.I hope I can make a good performance today and I am confident that I can succeed.My name is Wang Ye.My father is “Li Gang”.Li,we have known each other ,right? Last night you and I had our dinner together and I wonder if you have lost something.I believe that this book must belong to you.(Z拿出一本书，书中夹着几张100元钱，施接过书，把钱收起来，咳嗽两声，假装正经继续面试。)I have just graduated from XX University with good aility.And also, I have a powerful family background.I think it will be helpful to both of us if I can entre this company.That’s all, and I believe it is enough.Thank you.L: I am very optimistic about you.T:I am almost a saint, I have no shortcoming.It does not matter where I come from or where I will go.Never expcet me to question, I am not a good questioner.you do not need to keep my words in your mind, because what I say is trivial.If beauty is a sin, I have committed heinous crimes;if there is wrong with a type, I have made the same mistake again and again;if wise must be punished, I will be hacked in pieces;if modesty is subjected to be torture, how could I ever escaped in succeed?
L: I can felt your modesty.L: What is your ideal? Z Z: Don,t talk about ideal with me , I´m giving up.L: Do you have an ideal?T T: Never try to spy out my thought, it is an extremely dangerous thing.In such a reality world, I am not sure it is right or not to talk about the dreams.But anyway, everyone should have a dream, in case it comes true, right? I once had many dreams in my life, big or small, but now, I just want to get the offer of this joy.L: Ideal is very plentiful, reality is very skinny.4 years of age I dreams of being the kindergarten teacher, because the teacher unlimited to eat noodles, also can eat while chatting.I can only eat a bowl, can not eat too slow, can not speak, nor can spill soup on the table or someone else's pants.10 years old my ambition was to be the daughter of an English teacher, so she would not call me up and recite every day, nor will pulling my ears I have stuttered back.But then I saw her daughter who came back from the United States , Her ears is surprisingly large.14 years old my ideal is to have a high nose, I often do my homework near a lamp, then squinted to see my silhouette reflected on the wall , I´m very sad to find the silhouette of my face looks like a monkeys, no wonder no one from small to big said I look good.......Z and T: Stop！!L: OH.I,m sorry.It is too sad to recall the past.let's back to the topic.Z.Why shoud I choose you from so many candidates ? Z:Just as i said, I have a powerful family background.My entering your company will bring a lot of benefit to both the company and me.This is a Win-Win situation.L:Talk about your understanding of gender.Z: I understand your company’s plan, but sex is not the key to elect
personnel, it also based on the individual level.I have excellent performance in all aspects.Some boys do not better than me.I can play the advantages of girls.And I am so beautiful~~ L: You want to apply for what position.Z: Marketing.L:Why.Z:I have a huge drinking capacity.I will not drunk even after a thousand cups of wine.This is a greatest advantage in marketing.L: T.Tell me What are your greatest strengths? T: My biggest advantage is that I have no shortcoming, Everybody who knows me all suppose that.And I think I am quite modest, really.L:Why did you come to apply for our company T:Do not ask me so much why, it makes you look like very stupid.Neverthele, everyone deserves a joy, me too, Since I do not have a joy yet.I have to earn my live, also, I have no a adopted father to depend on like others.L: What do you think of the decision still difficult to do? T: If your mother and your girlfriend are drowning at the same time, which one you will save first.I think this question is the difficult one to answer.You know there can be too much truth in any relationships.L: Can you give me an example of team activities to prove your leadership ? T: Of course.But I need a minute to think since that there is so much to say.And it is a little difficult to me to think of the old thing.But as an old saying, every mountain is unclimbable until someone climbs.I am a student cadres in my college, and I always organized my clamates to participate in the labor activities.So, they all hated me in bones.L: Now let me test your intelligence.The first question ,Cut a cake three times then give to five people, so
how to cut ? Z: How to cut? T: Just like this, cut, cut, cut, ok.L: You don't want to add? The second question.A total of 25 people in a cla, the 15 is not female and the 16 is not male , so how many people in this cla? Z: Has anyone is neither male nor female? T: Are you sure to question me this stupid question? It is a huge insult to me.Twenty-five, by the way, never ask me such question again, thank you.L: OK.About this interview, we decide to hire both of you.Z, you have the background and strength, you are very suitable for sale.T, You're unique, You can go to planning department exert your talent.About the distribution of the work, do you have any questions? If not , tomorrow can be reported to the company.这时L的手机响了起来
L:What? Fang Zou zi, Anti-Counterfeit? Now I,m going back to the company clean up the me? Well, so be it.Z: What happend? L: The company is out of question, I Gotta GO.T and Z: What about us? L:You don't have to work in the company.T: Previously said that? L: All invalid.
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