英文搞笑剧本_三个搞笑剧本

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校园搞笑小品剧本：英语话剧《赖皮孙子糊涂爷爷》

2009-03-16 19:08

演员:P: Pirate-Grandson.M: Mother.F: Father.K: King-Grandpa.旁白: There are 4 members in a family, Pirate, a 7-year-old naughty boy.His mummy is a beautiful white-collar worker.His dad, Andy Lau is a famous singer, and his dear grandpa, King is a kindly old man.Pirate loves his grandpa most, because King is very spoiling him.He hates his parents.Frankly speaking, he is afraid of them, Because they are very strict with him..正剧：(P,K出场)

P: Old King, Open the TV, I want to see Tom and Jerry.I love that mouse.Quick!No time!I can’t wait another second.K: Oh dear!I nearly forget it.Don’t worry, I open it right now.(作开电视状)P: Ha Ha!It’s really funny!Tom is so good!(作高兴状)

Oh no!“The End!” Where is Tom? I hate the end!(摔电视机，作极度气愤状)Old King!?(对K吼)

K：Oh, what a pity dog!(作左顾右盼状)Your parents are not here ,and we can change another one ,our brave Pirate, just tell me.I’m sure your demand will be satisfied.(作充满自信状)

P：Really!OK!Now, let’s watch Caribbean Pirates!

K: Humm, No, it’s unfit for you„„(作犹豫状)

P: I just like this film, Old King, you tell lies.You don’t keep your promise.（作气愤欲泣状）

K;Oh yes, I play it for you.(作为难状)But please be quite, I’m afraid your parents wound not like us doing these.P: Don’t tell so much!I have been an adult man of 7 years old.I promise it to you.(作自豪自信状)

K：OK.(作舒心，安慰状)

P: Fight him, kill him.Throw these bad guys into the sea„„(高声喊)K: Xu „„..(作禁声状).Remember your promise, young adult man.P: Oh? What promise? I have forgotten it.(作天经地义状)

K: Oh?!You are right（作理解状，因为Pirate一贯如此，出尔反尔）

P: Old King.I give you an honorable miion.(作自豪状)Be my horse, and I will ride on your back , let’s help these people in dangerous situation, just like a brave knight.(作勇敢状)

K: What!Ride on my back!Be your horse！(作惊异状)

P: Yes, your hearing is very good, any question?(作若无其事状)

K: No, No, sound a good idea!Very good!You are a brave Pirate.Now come on my back.(作无奈状)

P:(作高兴状，作跃上马背状)Hei!Let’s go!Kill all those bad men.Quick!Run quick!.......(意气风发状)

（M,F携手进场）:

P: Oh, my god!Mummy, Daddy!(A,D作慌忙状，挡在电视机前)

M: Dad, what are you doing!? Naughty Pirate, isn’t your trick!?(作气愤状)

P:（作阳痿状）Mummy, it’s not my fault.Old king let me maage his back.Hei Hei(作心虚状，以掩饰内心的恐惧)

M: I don’t believe it.(作严肃状)Dad, isn’t really that?(询问K)

K: Yes, of course, I can’t image a child only 5 year old, can maage so good.Oh„„.(释然状，因为圆了我的谎)

M: Really.I don’t believe the litter pirate can maage, who taught him.(作怀疑状)Dear, isn’t you ?

F: No, I haven’t, but I decide to enjoy his maage another day, Do you think so, dear?

M: Yes, really a good suggestion.（P，D作惊恐状。A：发抖，D：挥汗)

（P挡着电视怕被M、F发现，K也为P作掩饰）

P: Mummy, Do you feel a little cold?

K: Yes, I can feel it.(边挥汗边说冷)

M: No, it’s summer.Really hot, do you catch cold?

P: No, No, just my feeling.(更加发抖，一不小心被B看到了电视)

M: Pirate, what’s behind you?(疑问状)

P: Oh, nothing, nothing!(作惊恐状)

M: Move away.little Pirate!(作气愤状)

P: Oh no!The storm will come.(捂脸作害怕状)

M: Caribbean Pirate!What’s a bad film!Little Pirate!?(气愤状)

P: Mummy, I surrender.(作投降状)

M: Daddy ,this film is unfit for him , it is full of killing，force and negative paion, and it will let him become bad!

K: I know that, but I meat to let him watch Tom and Jerry and he like it very much.Yes? Pirate?(想转移话题与Pirate站在同一战线)

P: Yes, a very clever mouse and a stupid cat.(作博学状)

M: Dad, don’t let him watch so much TV, it wastes a lot of time, and it is bad for his eyesight.He may become short-sighted.(诚恳状)